Posted by: Rob | November 21, 2008

A Friday Funny – A Truly Canadian Apology

There’s been quite a bit of serious stuff in….well, all aspects of real life lately.  Not to mention my employer’s stock is tanking big time and I just happen to own a few shares.  I know.  I know.  A lot of folks are feeling the pain and  I certainly don’t need to add anything more to that sphere of negativity right now.

So, to fill the time and the space on this blog, I’ve been combing through my desktop’s hard drive again looking for old and dusty gems.

I like this one.  It comes froma relatively long running “fake news” comedy show here in Canada called “This Hour has 22 Minutes“.  The political commentary is pretty much Canada-centric, so you kind of have to be plugged in to get many of the jokes.

This piece was presented by Colin Mochrie, a Canadian comic of some reknown in the US.  At least to anyone who has ever watched Drew Carey’s “Whose Line Is It Anyway“.  After Rick Mercer left 22 Minutes, Colin came “home” to fill that void for a season or two on the show.  This piece was aired in 2002, I believe, not long after the Winter Olympics in Salt Lake City.  Where Team Canada won the gold medal in Men’s Hockey AND in Women’s Hockey.

A truly Canadian Apology to the USA

courtesy of Colin Mochrie from This Hour Has 22 Minutes, CBC Television:

Hello. I’m Anthony St. George on location here in Washington.

On behalf of Canadians everywhere I’d like to offer an apology to the United States of America. We haven’t been getting along very well recently and for that, I am truly sorry.  I’m sorry we called George Bush a moron. He is a moron, but it wasn’t nice of us to point it out.  If it’s any consolation, the fact that he’s a moron shouldn’t reflect poorly on the people of America.  After all, it’s not like you actually elected him.

I’m sorry about our softwood lumber.  Just because we have more trees than you, doesn’t give us the right to sell you lumber that’s cheaper and better than your own.  It would be like if, well, say you had ten times the television audience we did and you flood our market with great shows, cheaper than we could produce. I know you’d never do that.

I’m sorry we beat you in Olympic hockey. In our defense I guess our excuse would be that our team was much, much, much, much better than yours.  As word of apology, please accept all of our NHL teams which, one by one, are going out of business and moving to your fine country.

I’m sorry about our waffling on Iraq.  I mean, when you’re going up against a crazed dictator, you want to have your friends by your side.  I realize it took more than two years before you guys pitched in against Hitler, but that was different. Everyone knew he had weapons.

I’m sorry we burnt down your White House during the War of 1812.  I see you’ve rebuilt it! It’s very nice.

I’m sorry for Alan Thicke, Shania Twain, Celine Dion, Loverboy, that song from Sheriff that ends with a really high-pitched long note. Your beer. I know we had nothing to do with your beer, but we feel your pain.

And finally on behalf of all Canadians, I’m sorry that we’re constantly apologizing for things in a passive-aggressive way which is really a thinly veiled criticism. I sincerely hope that you’re not upset over this. Because we’ve seen what you do to countries you get upset with.

For 22 minutes, I’m Anthony St. George, and I’m sorry.


  1. I must say, he is a sorry little man, and this is a sorry little piece. But it is funny, especially the camera angles.

    Hmm. A sorry little man? I think he’s one of the best masters of the deadpan I’ve seen. He had big shoes to fill at 22 Minutes (which is a pun sort of, because Rick Mercer is what you might call stature challenged) and I’m not sure he did all that good a job on the whole, because I don’t think the fake news comedy venue really fits his talents. However, he does a remarkable impression of an iconic Canadian journalist, Rex Murphy.

  2. love Colin Mochrie… and this is funny.

    hope your “stuff” eases up a bit…

    Thanks. Actually, overall, the “stuff” is not overly difficult to manage currently. I’ve been remarkably sanguine about the fact that a significant percentage of my retirement savings have evaporated nearly overnight. Even though I keep telling myself “You’re young. There’s time for it to build back. Be glad you’re not on the verge of imminent retirement right now.”, it’s been difficult to see what lies ahead and how to plan for it. I think there’s been a fundamental shift “in the world” and even though the hype is all about getting back on track, I think there has to be a different track. And no one seems to be seeing that. Or, maybe they are and they’re just not talking about it.

  3. Not long ago, my wife saw Colin Mochrie with one of the Mommy Mafia while I stayed at home and watched the kiddies. She loved it! I didn’t know he was Canadian.

    What I didn’t know was that he was born in Scotland and emigrated to Canada. It’s a conundrum, don’t you think? A funny Scotsman? Well, I guess there’s Billy Connolly, but he might be an alien.

  4. Agree with you that there needs to be massive change in both direction and “thrust” by world leadership AND citizenry – certainly in the US. Not sure folks get it yet – or are up to the challenge.

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